The Destiny of our Inner Child

Six of Cups in the tarot deck is showing the connection with our younger versions of the self and life.

I don't remember a time that I had a private session with someone and they didn't get emotional when meeting their child self. I also don't remember a time that this travel back and forth didn't help to bring to surface great issues, or even resolve them by bringing them to light.

I know, it may sound silly and a trend right now, where everyone talks about trauma and inner child healing. But it is not a current trend-back in 2010 the social media world was a baby itself-and even if it is, I hope it is here to stay, because I dream of a world where people will be highly connected with their repressed versions and eras and they will be going to therapy and bringing up children that are loved and supported.
Working with families and in co-operation with schools and kindergartens I soon discovered myself that the books were right. Children are like sponges and they absorb every little detail and since they cannot understand or express what exactly is happening with their caretakers, they try to adjust themselves to "survive" with the stressor or they develop psychosomatic symptoms, some of which they carry to their adult lives.

I am one example of this:

When I was 6 we moved suddenly 400 km away from home and I had to start school there. My mom was going through a difficult phase in her life with all the moving away stress and her father being terminally ill. I was highly sensitive and I swallowed all that stress, while my own fears and stressors were not being heard or comforted enough. I couldn't eat and I had stomach aches. In the mornings I started throwing up just before leaving for school.

Even though I worked with this issue in therapy and I am fully aware of what happened and why, I still sometimes wake up in the mornings and feeling nauseous. It happened even more when I first moved to Finland- the 2nd most spontaneous and biggest decision I ever took (1st comes birthing a human).

And every time I feel nauseous, I know it is my inner child. I talk to her in loud clear voice and I explain that now everything is ok and there is no need to feel stressed, we are good and we are safe and loved. I make her chicken soup and I ask for extra cuddles. I comfort her in any verbal and physical way needed. The stomach sickness does not indicate my failure to cope with reality, instead it shows how much I need to readdress my energy to myself and my wellbeing every time I start neglecting myself.

Being compassionate and loving to your mini self can work wonders. So I can't stop thinking these 2 connected worlds and their timelines:

-All these children that being shut off forever and they never get a change to breath and feel true love and connection.

-All these little inner children being shut off by their shut off adult versions, because they never learned to do differently.

Yes, I worry for both worlds, the real one and the unconscious one. And that is my superpower.

Danai Siamou-Kaarakainen, Psychologist/Psychotherapist